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You are not dealing with any ordinary, cookie cutter Jeep son.

This thing was forged from a single block of all American Tungsten Steel. Real sturdy. From that day forward my life has never been the same. Wrench yourself off that couch and see if you can handle this Jeep Wrangler Sahara. So if you are looking for a nice burning hatch back, a solar powered liberal mobile, or even a Hyundai crossover keep on looking my friend this thing is a piece of red white and blue American Machinery. This baby’s pulse is pumping 4.0 liters of unconsumed raw fuel through her straight six nuclear power plant. And rest assured this is no metro feminine automatic – you command her to obey, with your calloused hand planted firmly on the clutch. And she will obey, the first time, every time. If you can’t handle your stick shifter, or reach the clutch pedal, you better not ferry skip over here wanting to test drive her. If you stall her out, you can count on getting hit in the face with a piece of re-bar and sent back where you came from. It has A/C but are you kidding me… Really! If you want to blow the sweat off your brow, you do it the old fashioned way: doors off, top down. “What if it rains?”… “You whiney bitch I told you to stop raining…” Any man who drives this beast doesn’t give a damn about rain. Not even skin melting acid rain, cause he’s already dripping wet in blood, sweat, dip spit, and fish guts. If you are looking for the kind of jeep that has to be pansy parked in the garage, so the “carpet doesn’t get wet and soggy” Then you should plant your Obama sticker on some Japanese piece of shit. Cause this thing has drain holes in the floor and rhino lined to let the blood drain out from the buffalo you just killed, with your bare hands. Because you are William Wallace from Braveheart and when you get home you can leave your “sissy sponge glove car wash kit” in the pink bucket it came in. Go ahead and spark up your 6000 psi heated pressure washer on the daily trailer in your man cave, cause you are Tim Gilliepie and you can pressure wash your truck on the inside. She’s got rhino lined floors with a full roll cage in case that buffalo comes back to life while you’re doing 80 over some mountain pass or flooded river. If you’re thinking about Mexican chrome bumpers for her, think again. The bumper bashers come hand forged in a blacksmith shop in Franklin County over a wood burnin fire, out of a 4 inch wall casing, and railroad tracks and then I welded em to the damn chassis. That way if you get deployed you can piggy back this war wagon on a deuce and a half and chain her down tight from the four corners, so you don’t lose her when your convoy gets hit by a billboard roadside suicide bomber. And forget about putting one of those “It’s a Jeep Thing… You wouldn’t understand” stickers on this machine cause when you’re spotted in this American Classic there will be no questions, no further explanation required, people will understand and get out of your way… …real quick. If you think you’re ready to park this panty hauler on your tract of land. If you buy this jeep you better go get your old lady ready for some damn changes around your lair, cause this shit will be happening. What will be Happening? Glad you asked… 1. More chest hair. 2. You’re growing a beard. 3. Meat Only Diet. 4. T-Rex for a pet. 5. You’re taking a job at the lumber mill. 6. Your car carries five kegs. 7. Penis enlargement. 8. Extra more fish. 9. Wire bristled toothbrush. 10. Sex in the yard. 11. Sex in the garage. 12. All male offspring. 13. Chiseled jaw line. 14. Not giving a damn. 15. Heart turning to steel. 16. Fish slayer. 17. Hornless. 18. Better looking wives. 19. Bootlegging mistresses. 20. More selling. 21. More fighting. 22. More meat in the KITCHEN freezer.